i’m from hayward
hayward to your mom
i’m guadalajara joe
and my songs are da bomb
it’s a diggity wiggity hayyy
yo, i pump my private
parts every single day!
i snort poprocks in style
in the carls jr. drive thru
i get buck wild
with horny honeys
that do it like rabbits
they want big bacon burger
yeah right - i feed them cabbage
and i’m a savage
just like my buddy dennis
and i always hit homeruns
whenever i play tennis
hot damn,
mathew mark and john
i read the bible when i’m high
on crystal meth flan
flim flam
fatty boo blatty
when i worked as a valet
i dented a brand new caddy
i ain’t perfect
that’s for sure
but i try to be nice
even when the visions blurred
ya heaaarrd

i get on with my shetland ass
i shoot stress into space and just have a blast
i move my body to the beat
and when fine ladies get naked i think it’s rather neat

i’m high as a duck
that ain’t got wings
hockey puck to the face
that’s gonna sting
fly girl
i’ll rock your world
beats from garagaeband
necklace of pearls
on your chest
i’m the best cuz i’ll cheer
your booty up when you get depressed
so let’s get undressed
in my nest the only thing we’re wearing are
orange vests
and whipped cream in our hair
i ran outta mousse and i don’t care
you want dinner
‘i make you pb & j
need beauty products
my aunt sells mary kay
you want excitement
we can role in the hay
ride me sexy cowgirl
like it’s your birthday!
am i fun?
i’m an amusement park
blow out my candle
let’s play in the dark
you’ll be thinkin about me
all the time
i’m guadalajara joe
my favorite number’s 69

get on with your shetland ass
shoot your stress into space and just have a blast
I move my body to the beat
and fine ladies get naked i think it's rather neat